The Events of Tuesday, May 3, 2011

                Today, we woke up in a lovely countryside cottage in the English Cotwolds. We enjoyed breakfast as a family, and got ready for the day, packing a picnic lunch and other things into the car for our day trip to Stratford-upon-Avon, the hometown of William Shakespeare. After a wonderfully scenic drive, we parked at Bridgefoot, a “multi-storey” (meaning three stories) parking facility, and walked into town.

                Along the way to the Tourist Information Centre, we dipped into Marks & Spencer, where Rick Steves had said we could find groceries. However, upon entry, it took a bit of wandering around until we found that the groceries were in the back half of the building; the front half was a ladies’ department store, selling shoes, dress suits, and other feminine delights. Sadly, we didn’t buy anything!

                After that short stop-over, we continued on along Bridge Street (which we later learned was so named because it led to the bridge over the river Avon) to the pedestrian-friendly Henley Street, where we found a post office, a souvenir shop, and the Tourist Information Centre. At this point, we decided to divide and conquer. Mom and I headed to the Tourist Information Centre to ask my many questions, while Dad and Abby dipped into the post office for stamps to mail Abby’s British letter to Uncle Scott. Ben and Lindsey went into the souvenir shop to look for backpacks. Abby’s backpack, which I received for my sixth birthday, over ten years ago, broke a few days ago, and she wants to find one in the British Isles as a useful and long-lasting souvenir.

                While Lindsey and Ben were largely unsuccessful in their endeavor in the souvenir shop, Abby and Daddy had great success, finding exactly what they needed in the post office. At the Tourist Information Centre, a man at the desk was somewhat unknowledgeable, disappointingly so, though he did help us a little bit. Next, we headed back down to the river’s edge, where we enjoyed a delightfully restful half-hour. We watched the swans, geese, and ducks swim lazily in the picturesque river until it was time to head to the nearby Swan Fountain where our guided walking tour was to begin.

                We purchased our tickets from the guide, Barbara, and then embarked on an enjoyable two-hour Stratford Town Walk. She began by introducing us to the beloved hometown of both William Shakespeare and herself. We discussed at length the various construction phases of the Royal Shakespeare Theatres in the town. Then, she showed us many different examples of how the town has changed over the years, with black-and-white photographs of the way specific houses used to look – hideous – compared to their present black and white wattle-and-daub look. Soon, we stopped in front of a wattle-and-daub house that was different from the others we had seen. It was buff-colored. This, we learned, was Shakespeare’s birthplace.

                Around the corner, we looked down Henley Street for a glance at the Old Thatch Tavern, a famous pub with the only thatched roof still in town. Because fires were so common and destructive, thatched roofs were against the law once alternative roof construction evolved. However, this one managed to stick around – probably, a local legend goes, because every time the town mayor came in to the pub to tell them to replace their roof, the pub owner got him so drunk that he forgot why he came to the pub in the first place!

                Then, she went on to tell us how animals like birds, mice, cats, and dogs loved thatched roofs, because they could snuggle into a warm and cozy roof and just fall asleep. However, in rain, thatched roofs become unpleasantly cold and moist. So, just before the rain came, all the cats and dogs (instinctively knowing the weather forecast) would come leaping out of the thatched roofs, hence, the saying, “it’s raining cats and dogs”!

                Further down Rother Street was a peculiar, but prominent “American Fountain”, overlooking Stratford’s market square, an 1887 gift from American journalist George W. Childs of Philadelphia, to celebrate the Golden Jubilee of the rule of Queen Victoria.

                Next, Barbara skillfully led us safely across several busy streets, and then through a much quieter shopping center, where she showed us H&M, the British version of the American Children’s GAP or Gymboree, telling us that her grandchildren loved this shop.

                Her tour then led us past Nash’s House and New Place, where some exciting archaeological excavations were underway on the remains of New Place, the huge house that Shakespeare bought when he came back filthy rich from working as a playwright in London. She shared with us that Nash’s House belonged to William Shakespeare’s last direct descendent, his only granddaughter, Elizabeth Shakespeare, and her husband, Thomas Nash. This is important because it is the end of the direct line of William Shakespeare. Therefore, anyone claiming to be a direct, legitimate descendant of the great playwright is a two-faced, insincere fraud and an untruthful, mendacious impostor! Of course, one could always claim that he was a descendant of Shakespeare through the line of his illegitimate son with a lady innkeeper, but that would be scandalous.

                On the way to our next stop, we passed the Harvard House, built in 1596, a genuinely old wattle-and-daub house. This house was inherited and is maintained by Harvard University in Boston, Massachusetts.

                Next, Barbara led our tour group past Hall’s Croft, another historic Shakespeare family home. This house belonged to Shakespeare’s eldest daughter, Susana, and her husband, the town doctor. Barbara shared with us that, in Shakespeare’s day, a sore throat meant that one would have a frog held by its hind legs and dangled down one’s throat, as a tonic, hence, the saying, “I’ve got a frog in my throat”. She further informed us that research proved the remedy true; frogs emit mucus that acts as an antiseptic, and if enough of this fluid is swallowed, it can heal a sore throat. Gross.

                Our tour guide then led us to Shakespeare’s burial place, located in the Holy Trinity Church. The sign outside the church door read, “Holy Trinity Church with Shakespeare’s Grave OPEN.” This could be read two ways, the first being that the church is open for visitors, and the second, more shocking version being that the grave of the great playwright has been opened to allow visitors to view his bones.

                Barbara also told us that Shakespeare knew that the graveyard was a nasty place to reside after one’s death. He had observed that, when the church graveyard filled up, workers dug up the old decaying bones, shoved them into a huge pile and burned them: a “bone fire”, from which we derived the term “bonfire”.

                Shakespeare was incredibly fearful of this happening to his own remains, so he finagled a plot of land within the church in which he and his family members were buried. Then he composed a curse to be engraved on his tomb that went like this: “Good frend for Jesus sake forebeare,/ To digg the dust encloased heare;/ Bleste be the man that spares thes stones,/ And curst be he that moves my bones”. Pure poetry.

                What may have been Shakespeare’s boyhood school was the next and final stop on our tour. “King Richard the Third Boys’ Grammar School” is a wattle-and-daub building with ancient-looking timbers that still serves as a boys’ school today.

                After a grand finale of old-fashioned sayings and their origins from our saying-loving tour guide Barbara, the tour group dispersed, and we walked back to the parking garage, pulled out our picnic lunch, and set up a picnic on the grass just outside the parking garage. Ben thought this was inappropriate, because there was a beautiful riverfront nearby with benches and a view of the many swans and canal boats. On the other hand, I found it perfect – a beautiful patch of green grass and daisies, just the sight for yet another yummy lunch of bread, cheese, sandwich meat, carrots, apples, and flavorful British crisps.

                After lunch, we took a scenic shortcut to Shakespeare’s Exhibition and Birthplace. There, we planned to purchase the “All Five Combo Pass”. This would allow us admission to the interior of the three Shakespearean family homes we had seen the outside of, as well as to two 16th-century farms that were located out of town and also directly related to William Shakespeare. However, we, being the thrifty American tourists that we are, had amassed quite the collection of coupons, discount vouchers, two-for-one admission deals, and kids-go-free passes for the Shakespeare Trust. The lady at the admissions desk was very helpful deciphering which was the best combination of deals. Soon, we had found the best deal and were whisked into the Shakespeare exhibition, a very well-done modern museum consisting of theatre sets and videos, with automatic doors leading us from room to room. The two narrators, one male and one female, took turns narrating, which made it easier to listen to and absorb the information. However, they used “may well be”, “perhaps”, “perchance”, “might have been”, and other such tentative phrases constantly, making us aware of how much about the great playwright’s life is still unknown.

                Before long, we emerged into the sunlight of Shakespeare’s Birthplace’s garden and then entered Shakespeare’s birthplace. As we progressed from room to room, costumed guides explained to us what life would have been like for William Shakespeare and his family. Upon learning that John Shakespeare, the playwright’s father, was Stratford-upon-Avon’s mayor, a glove maker, a moneylender, and a property owner, we came to the conclusion that they were a fairly wealthy family.

                Upstairs, in “the Birth Room”, an exuberant female costumed guide explained to us the sleeping habits of an average family of Shakespeare’s time period. The mother and father slept in the bed, while the youngest baby slept in the crib. Any other children under the age of five (too young to join the sisters in the sisters’ room or the brothers in the brothers’ room) slept in the trundle bed, which could be pulled out further from underneath the bed to make room for another toddler. We also learned that green and red were believed to protect the family from dark and evil spirits, because green symbolized safety and protection, while red represented family love and togetherness. Therefore, these colors were liberally used to decorate the beds, from the bedding itself to the curtains around the four-poster bed. The costumed guide further informed us that the purpose of a four-poster bed, with the canopy on top, was to protect oneself from any critters that might fall through the thatched roof. Also, because baby boys died so much more frequently than baby girls, parents disguised their little boys as girls, by dressing them in long dresses to fool the devil, and it usually worked.

                Upon exiting the birthplace of William Shakespeare, we sat down in the garden on some benches opposite two finely dressed costumed guides, whom we had earlier seen acting out parts of Shakespeare’s plays. Now, however, we instead enjoyed a bit of guitar-strumming and love-song-singing by the fair maiden and the dashing gent smiling pleasantly and tapping his pointed and stocking-covered toes.

                Soon, it was time to move on to Nash’s House, following basically the same path as our earlier guided tour, because we trusted that Barbara, a local, would know the fastest way from Point A to Point B. The highlights here were a chance to see the archaeologists at work from the viewing platform, the very pretty Knot garden (named for its late owner), and the chance to overhear some helpful information from a staff member addressing a well-dressed tour group sipping champagne and nibbling some delicious-looking pastries. Upstairs inside the house, we explored the “Web of Life” exhibition, in which each glass pane held behind it the story of a Shakespearean character and how he or she accurately reflected the practices of the day in various categories from music and dance to eating and fashion.

                Hall’s Croft, our next stop, again following in our footsteps from earlier in the day, was the 17th-century home of Shakespeare's eldest daughter, Susanna, and her husband, Dr. John Hall, an eminent physician. It was an elegant house with luxurious rooms and beautiful decorations, in keeping with Dr. Hall's wealth and status. In the first room, we endured a talk about the four humors: blood, phlegm, yellow bile, and black bile. The gentleman kindly informed us that each bodily fluid corresponded to a Shakespearean character. For example, Hamlet was black bile, unpleasant to be with and generally dark and gloomy in personality. Kate, from The Taming of the Shrew, is like yellow bile, fiery in temper and difficult to control. Wandering the rest of the site, we experienced Dr. Hall's consulting room, with interesting medical artifacts and a first edition of his medical notes published in 1657. We also enjoyed the tranquil garden, filled with the beautiful roses and herbs mentioned by John Hall in his medical notes.

                When it was time to move on, we walked back along the riverfront, paid for parking, and tried to drive to Anne Hathaway’s Cottage to make it before the last entry time. However, we got very lost along the way, but found ourselves conveniently near a gas station with a good deal. So we filled up, saw a grocery store next door, and decided that it would be a good time to go grocery shopping. The store, Tesco, was quite large, impeccably organized, and easily navigable, but probably because all the signs and labels were in English. It was one of our fastest shopping trips yet!

                Afterwards, we headed home for dinner. We kids cooked up some frozen pizza and green peas for dinner, with Nutella spread on digestives for dessert, while Mom and Dad went out for an enjoyable date in the oldest pub in Chipping Campden, Eight Bells Inn. They dined on a delicious asparagus starter of asparagus, cheese, and sun-dried tomatoes wrapped in bacon, followed by a main meal of bangers and mash (sausage and mashed potatoes), topped with the best onion rings yet, and roast lamb.

                When they came home, we went to bed, looking forward to even more Shakespeare tomorrow. We wanted to get all the Shakespeare sights done today, but that didn’t work. Still, we had an enjoyable day, so, as Shakespeare says, “All’s Well that Ends Well!”